WARNING: What you are about to read will disillusion you beyond repair if you ever thought that we, the staff of Elevation Church, were an intellectually superior assembly of theologians who spend our staff meetings refuting Karl Barth’s neo-orthodoxy and developing new angles from which to substantiate the hypostatic union.

See, we have a quote box on the white board in our conference room.
The game is simple. If you say something funny, dumb, confusing, pointless, random, or any combination of these 5 in our Monday morning staff meeting, I get up, grab a marker, and write your quote on the bottom left hand side of the board.

I know you want examples. I’ve got plenty.

“Once we get ‘em there, we’ve got ‘em there.”
-Chunks Corbett, Executive Pastor, on what time we should hold our New Year’s Eve services. Deep huh?

“I just never realized that I was a part of something so big.”
-John Bishop, Small Groups Pastor, reflecting on his time as…
a McDonald’s Employee.

“That’s just the color of the sky in the world where I live.”
-Larry Brey, Assimilation Pastor/Minister of Optimism, explaining why when we guess how many people are going to show up for something he guesses 3 times the amount that everyone else guesses.

“I’ve seen people die early because they were just sorry. They were just sorry.”
-Chunks Corbett, yet again, on death and sorry people. Harsh. Second sentence gives a special, extra harsh emphasis, I think.

“Bring your fresh cornbread.”
-John Bishop on how to give more effective invitations. I think.

“We can’t get to week 2 without week 1.”
-Me from this morning. I don’t even know what I meant. It was early and I only slept 2 hours last night.